Category Archives: my favorite things

A Family Valentines

I sat on the back porch in the afternoon sun watching the kids squeal with excitement to be outside. They chased bubbles on the steps and down the only narrow pathway paved from snow. Ava made some new tracks through the backyard mounds and Hyrum got stuck trying to follow. Then she sat on the fence by the little tree and said, “Hey mom do you remember when I used to climb this tree?” like it’s been years since it had leaves and branches warm enough to climb. Sometimes it feels that way.

Then Jake came home with chocolate covered strawberries and an empty snack container to make a piggy bank with Ava. She was so excited.

We lit candles and ate on paper plates to avoid dishes after dinner. Hyrum kept trying to blow the candles out and turn back on the lights (he’s only seen candles on a birthday cake and that’s just what you do!) We pulled the sparkling grape juice from the snow outside and cheers-ed to a Happy Valentine’s Day with our four paper cups.

We finished the night with a game of candy land and cinnamon rolls from a dear friend then watched the kids dance to music across the family room floor before tucking them in bed with lots of I love you’s.

Ava fell asleep within minutes of cuddling, and when I laid next to Hyrum to try to help him fall asleep, he pressed his little hand onto the side of my face, brought it right against his and gave me a kiss. I smiled the happiest of smiles and told him I loved him, to which he replied, “Love you Mom.” My heart could burst I so adore him.

Between the love of my life and these two little love bugs, we’re all just full of love over here and I just feel so lucky. #mamanotes

A Growing Heart

While I was penguin walking up the stairs this morning in my robe and overdue-for-a-shower hair, feeling the weight of this growing bump in my hips and the icky cold that’s been going around, Ava stayed right at my side, looking up at me.

Surely she was wondering why mom was looking so disheveled.

“How come you keep looking at me?” I asked in my raspy congested morning voice.

“Because I just love you, and you made my birthday feel so special.”

I stopped and looked down at this little five year old, who just a few years ago hardly noticed the significance of such a day. It sure meant a lot to hear that. Last night against the heaviness of our tired eyes and achy heads, Jake and I stayed up late putting together her new bike and decorating the house with streamers and balloons. I didn’t want to stay up, I wanted to go to sleep. But things like this just make birthdays feel so special, and I knew Ava would love it. It was only eight in the morning and she was already spilling over with a grateful heart.

I spent most of the day on the couch, too sick to do much of anything, and I felt so bad that I couldn’t be more involved in doing special things for her on her special day. But she didn’t see that. She saw all the ways I was trying and said thank you so many times for making it the “best birthday ever.” (I think her first ever birthday party over the weekend helped with that. :))

In five short years, her cheeks have thinned, her curls have softened, and her little heart has grown. Or maybe that was mine. She is a radiant light that has only gotten brighter in our family over the years, and she is teaching me how to be more patient, selfless, and grateful (among so many other things).

At the end of the day while I worked in the kitchen finishing up her birthday dinner (she requested chicken stir fry), she ran around me like a little worker bee, putting away dishes, setting the table, even sweeping the floor for me. When I asked her why she was doing all that she said, “Because you’ve just made my birthday so special and I want to help you.”

Ava you surely bless us.

Fair are the meadows

I woke up to some hefty tantrums from my two year old, was already feeling emotional for whatever reason (feeling trapped in winter, lingering sicknesses, pregnancy hormones, etc.) and by the time Jake was heading out the door to leave, I could hardly say goodbye through my tears as I put the kids’ socks and underwear in the drawer.

Later that morning I stood at my kitchen sink washing dishes from the night before, staring at the hazy mounds of white and bare branches out the window. Winter has been hard this year. It’s only January and yet I am feeling so trapped in this cold, insatiably dreaming of warm places and green trees. Even the desert sounds dreamy. Cliche as it all sounds, these feelings are so drowning sometimes.

Lately I’ve been trying to focus on getting things done, playing with the kids, and appreciating every ounce of sunshine that beams through our windows. I am trying to be positive, to keep my head up.

This morning I sang hymns while I did the dishes.

Fair is the sunshine,
Fairer the moonlight
And all the stars in heav’n above;
Jesus shines brighter,
Jesus shines purer
And brings to all the world his love.

As I sang the words to this children’s song, I realized they were exactly what I needed to hear.

Fair are the meadows,
Fairer the woodlands,
Robed in the flowers of blooming spring;
Jesus is fairer,
Jesus is purer.
He makes the sorrowing spirit sing.

Jesus is fairer. He is more than all those meadows and flowers and beaches that I long for. He can make my sorrowing spirit sing. I need to be reminded of that. While I wait for those beaming rays on my legs and toes, He can be my light and my warmth.

As I finished the song, I felt a calming peace around me, like I was being wrapped in a hug. It filled me from the inside out–every longing hushed. His Spirit was there, lifting me from my sadness, reminding me that He is there, He is always there. I felt the Savior’s love, and that was more filling than any sparkling seashore or desert sand that I have so lately craved.

I really needed that, and Heavenly Father knew. That’s why He sent His Son to be our Savior, because we really need Him, every hour we need Him, even when we don’t realize it at first.

Grateful for that reminder today. He made my sorrowing spirit sing.

Dreamy Room

When we first moved into our townhouse rental here in ND, I was hesitant to decorate. I knew it was a temporary place for us and I really didn’t want to spend the time unpacking, putting up, taking down, and repacking all the pictures and decor. Well, after a few months I got tired of the empty walls and lack of pretty spaces so I put things up. I still had a box or two of decorations for Ava’s room tucked away under seemingly everything in her closet, and figured that since she and Hyrum would be sharing the bedroom, a nice neutral would be just fine (meaning totally plain.) Eventually I did get out a purple bedspread to add some color, but it was definitely lacking in the pretty department.

Well the past few months Ava has been asking A LOT to put things up in her room. I feel bad for putting it off so long, I just really don’t like hanging things on walls and planning it all out (especially if it’s only temporary.) I think too much about it. Anyway, the other day I put off my to-do list, dug through those boxes deep in her closet, and pulled out all of her room decor. She was beyond excited. She awed as we put each simple thing up. When it was all up and the bedspread changed (and it really wasn’t a whole lot, but made it look so much better) she kept saying, “I just can’t get over my room! It’s just so beautiful!” and smiles every time she walks into it.

It was totally worth it. Even I wish I had such a light and pretty room!

Ava got this little picture of Jesus from her sunbeam teacher at church last year. She loves it. When she first got it, she took it everywhere with her, and even set it up on our table at a restaurant 🙂
Everything up so high so it doesn’t get taken down by little hands…and it could use a headboard…but it’s improvement!

Anyway, one of the decorations is this hanging shell wind chime which makes subtle calming clinks when the fan is on.

Hyrum and I have started a new routine of cuddling before his nap to help him fall asleep (nap time’s been a struggle lately…), and while I laid there next to him today with those little clinks in the background, I dozed off myself. Completely unintentionally, my mind went to an open pasture with a big tree and a little brook, and I laid there against that tree with the breeze and the trickling water, watching the kids play and feeling so perfectly content. It was so perfect. I noticed that Hyrum was also seemingly so content in his sleep (and I could get up and get things done,) but I stayed there in my dreaming for a little while just soaking it in.

When I got up I thought about that sweet dream I had in those few short minutes and how easily that little chime and that fanned breeze took me to my happy place. I do hope that someday we can live in a place as lovely as that, or make it as lovely as that. It’s my great dream to live in an open space with big trees and water and places to rest and play with my little ones in the afternoons. I’d even be ok with all the bugs as long as there were butterflies and singing birds. It’ll be interesting to see where we end up. I may just be dreaming for a quite a while!

…And I think I may start sleeping in the kids’ room more often… 🙂 #mamanotes

New Year’s and Nerf Guns

“And thank you that we could stay in Utah longer than seven days, and please bless the twins that they will grow healthy and strong, and bless all the people of the world and bless Daddy’s eye and mommy’s lip that they will get better…” (Ava’s bedtime prayer tonight)

We drove home from our trip to Utah today. We pulled up to snow drifts up to our waist, a walkway shoveled by our kind neighbor, and a warm house that didn’t stink (no hidden diapers or smeltering garbages! 🙌) Jake hauled everything in from the car while Ava and I started unpacking inside. We cooked up some food from the freezer, snacked on Christmas truffles, and unwrapped the package of 200 nerf bullets that Jake ordered from China over a month ago (we just got the package.) And since we realized after ordering that they wouldn’t arrive by Christmas, Jake ordered another 200 from Amazon so we could all play with the four nerf guns we got on Christmas morning. 😂
So, we piled the new 200 with the other 200, strapped on whatever glasses we could find, piled up the suitcases and laundry baskets, and teamed up to shoot at each other.

I soon learned that those little foam bullets pack a punch!! I told Jake we should’ve just gotten those little guns that shoot soft, colorful rings but we settled on these eye poking, lip numbing, red mark-making foam bullets and had so much fun regardless. (After Hyrum shot Jake in the eye and he lost his peripheral vision for a while [somehow it got him WITH his glasses on] we decided shooting targets at the laundry basket would be a better way to end the night. 😬👍) It’s good to be home.

Cheers to a happy new year!
#mamanotes #welcome2017

Update: I ordered safety goggles! It was funny because when I was browsing on Amazon for some, many of the items in the “frequently bought with” section were nerf guns and nerf ammo. Haha! Why didn’t I see any safety goggles on there when we ordered our nerf guns!?

Well, we have them now. 🙂

The kids really like them, except Hyrum’s pinch his cheeks in half and cover over half his face so he doesn’t like to keep them on long. Totally ok, I don’t last long in nerf gun battles anyway.