Tuesday

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Sunday. Hyrum fell asleep on the way home, so I carried him up to his crib, got Ava a snack, then rested on the family room couch. I was soon asleep, and woke only briefly when Jake came home. He went downstairs to watch scripture videos with Ava, and I went back to sleep. I woke to the sound of Hyrum stepping down the stairs, one at a time, his elephant hanging from his hand, calling, “ma!” in his little raspy wake up voice. We went downstairs to find Jake and Ava asleep, so we put on our shoes and wandered out back for a little walk by the pasture near our house. Hyrum stopped and squated to observe every moving thing, every grasshopper, cricket, and ant. And he loved to watch the horses. “Mom, orse, neigh!” he’d say.

We had breakfast for dinner, I burned the bacon so we opened the doors and windows before the smoke alarm went off. All the flies came in. After dinner at Ava’s request, we went outside to the trampoline to watch the sunset. So many giggles playing out there. In true Schellenberg fashion, Jake was jumping and rolling in his Sunday best. The kids loved having him home. We stayed until the sun went down and the colors got brighter, then huddled downstairs to watch home movies. Hyrum wandered around the room most of the time, but Ava seemed so captivated, smiling as she watched her 1 year old self babbling away.

It’s Tuesday now, but I wanted to write that down to remember it. Surely the day was not without meltdowns and messes, but it was our together time, the four of us, and it was so good as simple as that. #mamanotes

Monday. I sat against the garage with my recipe book and sticky pad, waiting for Ava’s bus and trying to come up with a menu for the week. I like planning the meals, and a new recipe sounds like fun until the end of the day when I’m so tired that tuna sandwiches sounds like a great idea. So tuna sandwiches it was!

I packed steamed veggies in a tupperware, grabbed a can of pineapple, and wrapped some forks in napkins and we had ourselves a nice little picnic at the park! Jake replaced the tire on my bike when he got home, so we packed the picnic supplies in the back of Hyrum’s bike trailer, and biked around for a bit before stopping to eat at the park. Ava ate mostly pineapple and Hyrum ate everything. The sun went down quickly so we didn’t stay long. For family home evening we talked about the story of the Ten Lepers and how God gives us miracles and blessings too–then we went outside and looked at the stars with Jake’s new super laser pointer. It kind of scares me how strong it is, but the kids loved it.

Lately the kids have had a hard time getting to sleep because Hyrum keeps getting out of his crib. A lot of times he rolls out onto Ava’s bed, but then they chat and giggle or tease and neither of them gets to sleep. Well last night they fell asleep in the same bed! Hyrum was kind of on top of her all sprawled out, but it was the cutest thing. We put him in his crib, then retired for the night ourselves at 9:30! That’s been our goal for a LONG time and it felt pretty good to stick to it. #mamanotes

Mama Notes

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Wrote a few mamanotes from the other day…

By the time the afternoon rolled around yesterday, I was beat. Fortunately the storm rolled in along with it, and Ava was tired too. She liked the idea of chocolate chips and storm watching just as much as I did. So she laid her head on my lap right there on the kitchen floor by the back screen door as the clouds deepened and the breeze thickened with rain. And that was just what we both needed. #mamanotes

I walked into our bedroom after I checked on the kids and turned off the hall light. Jake was in bed laughing to himself. “What’s so funny?” I asked. “I’m just replaying in my head our race with Ava to eat our salads.” Our four year old might have a strong will, but she is always up for a race. Whether it’s a race to brush her teeth, get into bed, or eat her spinach salad, for some reason it works every time! So when she was adamant that she didn’t want to finish her spinach leaves and ranch dip, Jake said to her, “Let’s see who can finish their salads the fastest!” Without hesitation, she grabbed a green leaf, dipped it in the ranch, and threw it into her mouth.
And then the part Jake was laughing about– she looked at us, then with both hands like a bull dozer, wiped her whole pile of spinach through the dip in one swipe and stuffed it all into her mouth.

Jake and I stopped mid-chewing our second bite to see her smiling as best she could with her cheeks stuffed and her lips lined in dressing. Within a minute it was chewed and swallowed, and that little girl creamed us, flat. 😂👏 #mamanotes

Yesterday while Hyrum napped Ava said to me, “I want to play with you Mom.” So play we did. She giggled as she trotted straight towards me hiding behind that trash can. I was sure she peeked while she counted. When she came up to me laughing I said, “Hey, did you peek?” to which she replied with equal laughter, “No I could see your bum sticking out!” 😂👏 I carried her back to the house on my shoulders after a few games of crack the egg and follow the leader on the trampoline. I felt that if there was one good, important thing I needed to do that day, it was that. I feel like we grow closer in these moments than most any other time. And we need it. We will always need it. #mamanotes

And just a few from the day Jake found a little baby bird on our front lawn and we spent part of our family home evening finding worms for it. How did I never know that hose trick?!

Sweet Assurances

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I wrote this letter to Ava in my journal the other day and wondered if I should share it. Sometimes I feel funny about sharing my personal thoughts and feelings, but ultimately that’s why I have a blog–to share the things that shape me and inspire me and bring me joy–hopefully we can share goodness with others too.

Dear Ava,

Today you seemed so happy. It was a family day with Daddy home and Hyrum running across the carpets with his gap-toothed grin, as usual. You love these days. Daddy made you breakfast and a fort downstairs where you watched a show together. Then you and Daddy played monster, giggling under the blankets waiting for me to find you. Then it was jacket time and socks and boots and pants because your friends might be home and you love playing with them. After a few minutes of jumping on the trampoline they went inside for breakfast and the two of us jumped up and down and chased each other’s shadows. While we hopped in circles you told me how you love jumping with me.

I love jumping with you too. I love playing with you and learning with you and being so happy with you. We all do. You are so spirited and fun and eager to enjoy all the goodness around you.

Tonight after riding our skateboards and bikes to the park, Daddy went to church for the priesthood conference session and I bathed you and your brother and smoothed aloe on your sun pinked skin. You played all day under those warming rays, jumping and running and laughing with your friends. You were tired. I tucked your little legs under the covers and said our bedtime prayer, at your request. Your head stayed up for just a few moments before slipping onto the mattress with the close of your eyes. In that quiet moment at the edge of the bed, I thanked Heavenly Father for this beautiful day with you and Daddy and Hyrum. I thanked Him for the Gospel and all the goodness and joy we have because of it. And then I prayed for heaven’s help. I prayed for help as I learn how to mother. As I struggle to mother.

A few times this week as I stood against your sass and strong will, I wondered how to do it. There is so much I don’t know and my weaknesses are becoming apparent. Sometimes I think about all the mothers that have done it and are doing it and that gives me strength. But you know what gives me the most strength? I know that we have heaven on our side. Raising you two little ones is the greatest thing I could be doing right now, and I have God and the angels in heaven to help me. I have no doubt that they have whispered in my ear from time to time how I can be a little more patient or humble or kind. I want you to know that in the Gospel of Jesus Christ we can be taught from on high if we ask for it and listen. So that is what I prayed for.

All my love,

Mom

Blissful Togetherness

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I know I’m a little late on this post, but the week before last we celebrated Easter! And I felt like this year more than ever, I really celebrated it. I really appreciated it. I never got around to dying eggs (it seems I fail at that every year–but this year at least I boiled some!) but I read A LOT about the Easter story in the New Testament and the Book of Mormon. It has FILLED my heart and increased my gratitude for our Savior, Jesus Christ, and Our Father in Heaven, who sent Him to us. Easter morning was all the more meaningful as we greeted the sun and recognized the eternal LIGHT and LIFE we can have because of Him.

ALSO on Easter, we packed the day with so many good things. Kite flying, egg hunting, and church going, to name a few. After church, ours was a napping house. ALL of us were sleeping. It was wonderful. The day continued with baking and bubbles and a whole lot of blissful togetherness and I couldn’t help but recognize, especially this day, that all this goodness, joyfulness, family-ness, is possible FOREVER because of HIM. On this day we rejoiced with the world that “He is risen, as he said.” Thanks be to God for the gift of His son.

Because He Lives! | Easter Thoughts — There’s something about babies in jammies that I just LOVE! And I particularly love how these highlight his little chubs. We adore him!

Home Movies

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This Lake We Love from Tamara Schellenberg on Vimeo.

When we moved to North Dakota, we were thrilled that we would be so close to such a large lake. We both grew up boating with our families at Lake Powell, and we have always loved playing out on the water. This place couldn’t be more fitting for us with the third largest man-made lake in the U.S., after Lake Powell and Lake Mead. It covers 480 sq. miles!

We arrived in ND late in the season, but we still took as many opportunities as we could to get out and play–even into November. And when winter came, we visited this lake again–this time with a ball and boots for the frozen shores.

I put this video together with clips from some of our trips to the lake this year. Editing our family videos together is one of my very favorite things to do. If someone gave me a few hours without kids to do whatever I wanted, this would probably be it. That may seem totally weird, but I have always loved home movies. When I was a kid I would spend hours sitting on my parents’ bed watching them, inviting any family members that I could to join me. What happened to home movies??

Anyway, I am hoping I can squeeze in some more time this year to make them (and catch up on past ones.) The four of us love to watch them over and over.

And in terms of other goals I have for this year…

With my little wedges of free time, I am excited to pick up where others have left off in gathering records and memorabilia of my ancestors. My hope is to share their stories and their strength with my own family and make my temple experiences more meaningful. I have started doing this over the past few weeks, and I am loving it so much. It feels like a mystery game sometimes trying to piece names and dates and family lines together, but there is so much purpose to it. I’m finally doing what I have felt like I should do for so long and that always feels good.

I also plan on continuing this blog that I started. It’s another one of those things I felt inspired to pursue all that time ago, and I am really enjoying it. It’s been a nice place for my thoughts and little snapshots of our life.

And fourth, I’m going to try to get to know my sewing machine a little better so that those piles of clothes that need to be repaired don’t go forever unattended.

So those are my plans for 2016, my goals you could say. I like making goals as I go, January is sometimes too formal or intimidating to me. I am sure I will come across plenty more ways I want to improve my life as the year goes on. These are just a few on my mind lately. 🙂